Saturday, July 11, 2009

Dear SpongeBob,

Please stop stalking us. It's kinda creeping me out... I see you taunting my Jack in the Go-gurt, BandAid, pool towel, shirts, and fruit snack aisles of Target/Walmart/Walgreens and the like. For some reason, despite never having have seen your show, he loves you. When you follow us around whispering "buy me, buy me" in his ear, I have to break out my "mean mommy." I have to make up some ridiculous tale about how the fruitsnack/bandaid/towel/shirt/etc box says he has to be a "big boy", like age 5, to get it (yes, you annoy me that much). I am hoping by this point he has moved on to bigger and better things like maybe wanting High School Musical paraphenalia... it will be much more logical to say--- oh, you have to be in HS to get that! (ahahaha)

I am not sure what mother's let their children watch you but I kinda feel like you and your gang are a bunch of NOVAs (No Value Added). Not that I am judging, to each his own, but quite honestly the thought of watching a bacteria filled sponge makes my skin crawl. Perhaps you should learn a thing or two from Super Why, Big Bird, Dora and Diego, and Brother and Sister (Bearnstein) Bear and teach the children of America something besides jibberish.

Jack's Mommy

1 comment:

  1. Thank you! That's the best letter ever! I can't stand SBSP! Yuck! Bo is the same way. I do not know how they know all about him without EVER seeing the show!